The Mayhem Kids.....A Dichotomy of Behavior....AKA What Happened to the BOY?

Any parent of multiple children will quickly tell you that each has his or her own distinct personality.

I had heard many a story like this and had experienced it, firsthand, with my own siblings.

Yet....nothing could quite prepare me for the INCREDIBLE differences between my son and daughter.

Thursday, The Princess received some amazing news (enter bragging mom).....we found out that she was chosen as Student of the Year for her school. I can not even put into words how proud of her and excited I was!

However, while I was preparing my "Mother of the Year" acceptance speech, I gazed at JM's folder.

On the EXACT same day, Junior Mayhem came home on red. This means he moved his pin twice. He was written up for throwing rocks, kicking rocks, (Seriously...what is UP with him and ROCKS?) and stomping his feet at his teacher.

So....I am thinking I better bask in the glow of The Princess's achievements......as my goal for JM is reverting back to keeping him out of the orange jumpsuit! :)

Oh....and in case you are wondering....I blame his father! I NEVER caused trouble in school!

Currently Seeking Therapy

*******TMI ALERT*******

(BTW.......TMI stands for "Too Much Information" You have been warned!)

Remember all the delicious foods that go alongside the holidays?

Yeah....me too.....I ate them.....seemingly nonstop for nearly a month.

Don't misunderstand....I enjoyed myself..........EVERY. SINGLE. OVERINDULGENT. BITE!

Of course...having ingested vast amounts of holiday goodies left me with some very much unwanted weight.

This weight prompted me to begin a search for a garment. One that might help to shield my excess from the world until I was able to rid myself of it! (Working on that now.) This search led me to Spanx.

I perused the site and made my order. The package arrived, and I was eager to see what was inside. Imagine my surprise when I pulled it out and realized it was crotchless!

Not since my friend and I went into a Frederick's on a dare in college had I beheld anything sans crotch. AND since there was nothing even remotely sexy about this garment, I was intrigued as to why that important area was missing. As I read the tag, I began to realize that this was to aid in the responding to calls of nature. IN FACT....the tag said something along those lines.

This garment was made so that it did not have to be removed when going to the restroom.

Well....I am here to tell YOU.....don't believe the hype......and.......WHATEVER YOU DO........EVEN IF YOUR LIFE DEPENDS ON IT......DO NOT........I repeat.......DO NOT.......attempt to use the restroom while wearing the garment.......it will NOT end well.

My advice......just let your fat roll show until you get motivated enough to get rid of it. I can ASSURE you.....I will be employing this tactic from now on!

So....I am currently seeking therapy to deal with my new found fears of both restrooms and shaping garments. Will keep you posted on my progress!