We will be staying at the Waldorf Astoria.
We will have 6 nights without kiddos. I have NEVER been away from my kids for that long!
I am REALLY excited about it!
We need recommendations for restaurants and sites to see!
Did I mention I was excited?
Sunday, April 19, 2009
NYC or Bust!
Mr. Mayhem and I are headed for New York City on Friday. I cannot begin to put into words how excited we are about the trip!
We will be staying at the Waldorf Astoria.
We will have 6 nights without kiddos. I have NEVER been away from my kids for that long!
I am REALLY excited about it!
We need recommendations for restaurants and sites to see!
Did I mention I was excited?
We will be staying at the Waldorf Astoria.
We will have 6 nights without kiddos. I have NEVER been away from my kids for that long!
I am REALLY excited about it!
We need recommendations for restaurants and sites to see!
Did I mention I was excited?
Thursday, April 16, 2009
For the Love of Foliage
The stories about Junior Mayhem abound here. There is never a shortage of crazy things that either escape his mouth, or are performed by him on a daily basis.
So....yesterday should have come as NO surprise to me.
It started out simple enough. I accompanied my VERY PREGNANT sister to the doctor. (We'll be meeting my new nephew next Tuesday.....BTW)
My mother watched the kids while we went to the appointment. Afterwards, we all agreed to go to lunch together.
On the way out of my mother's house, JM found a leaf that struck his fancy. Somehow he managed to get it into the car without any of our knowledge.
It wasn't until we were entering the restaurant that I noticed it in his grubby little hand. I don't need to tell you that convincing (read: THREATENING) him to drop the leaf outside was no small feat.
"Someone is going to take my leaf......they won't know it is mine.....and they will take it home with them!"....he implored.....to no avail.
It was then that I flippantly replied, "Don't worry about that leaf....it's filthy!"
Right then and there.....JM's love affair with "Filthy Leaf" began.
When we were exiting the restaurant, he announced, "I have to find my filthy leaf......I hope nobody took it!"
Surprisingly enough, the instances of filthy leaf theft have been on a decline in this part of town.....so there it laid....in all it's filthy glory....just waiting to be snatched up by one overzealous five year old.
Filthy leaf accompanied us to the movies, where it was given the seat of honor near JM. It accompanied us to the restroom at said movies.......you remember our earlier run in with possible FL thieves. It accompanied us to our home, seated right next to JM....where he could keep a close eye on it....at all times.
The one time I accidentally crunched a small part of FL........was met with less than approval.
It wasn't until JM went to bed that I was forced to send FL to meet its maker.
If only.....poor, pitiful JM had ANY toys to play with.....he wouldn't be forced to play with filthy foliage!
So....yesterday should have come as NO surprise to me.
It started out simple enough. I accompanied my VERY PREGNANT sister to the doctor. (We'll be meeting my new nephew next Tuesday.....BTW)
My mother watched the kids while we went to the appointment. Afterwards, we all agreed to go to lunch together.
On the way out of my mother's house, JM found a leaf that struck his fancy. Somehow he managed to get it into the car without any of our knowledge.
It wasn't until we were entering the restaurant that I noticed it in his grubby little hand. I don't need to tell you that convincing (read: THREATENING) him to drop the leaf outside was no small feat.
"Someone is going to take my leaf......they won't know it is mine.....and they will take it home with them!"....he implored.....to no avail.
It was then that I flippantly replied, "Don't worry about that leaf....it's filthy!"
Right then and there.....JM's love affair with "Filthy Leaf" began.
When we were exiting the restaurant, he announced, "I have to find my filthy leaf......I hope nobody took it!"
Surprisingly enough, the instances of filthy leaf theft have been on a decline in this part of town.....so there it laid....in all it's filthy glory....just waiting to be snatched up by one overzealous five year old.
Filthy leaf accompanied us to the movies, where it was given the seat of honor near JM. It accompanied us to the restroom at said movies.......you remember our earlier run in with possible FL thieves. It accompanied us to our home, seated right next to JM....where he could keep a close eye on it....at all times.
The one time I accidentally crunched a small part of FL........was met with less than approval.
It wasn't until JM went to bed that I was forced to send FL to meet its maker.
If only.....poor, pitiful JM had ANY toys to play with.....he wouldn't be forced to play with filthy foliage!
Saturday, April 11, 2009
Easter Top Three
We like to consider ourselves a christian family....here at the chaos that IS the Castle of Mayhem.
We attend church regularly. We all own bibles. (Try to contain your enthusiasm.) We go to Sunday School. We try to remember to pray before we eat our meals.
We are obviously not applying for any sainthood positions, but I thought Mr. Mayhem and I were doing a decent job of raising our kids with a strong faith.
That is....until we had three experiences that led me to believe we are FAR from where we need to be.
SO.....I give you:
We attend church regularly. We all own bibles. (Try to contain your enthusiasm.) We go to Sunday School. We try to remember to pray before we eat our meals.
We are obviously not applying for any sainthood positions, but I thought Mr. Mayhem and I were doing a decent job of raising our kids with a strong faith.
That is....until we had three experiences that led me to believe we are FAR from where we need to be.
SO.....I give you:
The Top Three Reasons I know The Family Mayhem may have some Christianity Issues
1. When we were speaking to The Princess about Easter, she exclaimed, "Easter is on a Sunday? I thought the day changed every year!" Yeah...the DATE changes....but somehow.....Albert Einstein missed the fact that it ALWAYS occurs on a Sunday!
2. While dying Easter eggs last night, Junior Mayhem was going to town writing on his egg with the magic crayon.....you know, the one that does not show up until after the dye is on. We waited with baited breath to see the creative masterpiece that would soon be shared with all of us.......only to see he had written, "Fat Princess" on his egg. It was an obvious show of LOVE for his older sister. (Who is MOST CERTAINLY NOT fat.....I might add!)
3. Finally, Junior Mayhem put the last nail in our coffin when he shared this lovely gem of knowledge. We were discussing why we celebrate Easter. I had already had this discussion with him earlier and was giving him an oral pop quiz of sorts.....My question went like this:
"Jesus died for our sins on the _______________?" To which he replied, "earth?"
I'm pretty sure we'll be getting our own praise show soon.
Happy Easter.
Let us not forget that He died on the EARTH for our sins! :)
Tuesday, April 07, 2009
We Now Return to Our Regularly Scheduled Whine Fest!
Sorry I haven't been around as much....of late. My life consists of work, running errands, ball practice, theater practice.........and other nonsense!
Just because I had a craptastic day....I thought I'd share some things that are royally pissing me off...right now....because....that's what I do.
I give you..........the return of.........WHY the *#$@#&&^@%! (insert your favorite profanity here):
Just because I had a craptastic day....I thought I'd share some things that are royally pissing me off...right now....because....that's what I do.
I give you..........the return of.........WHY the *#$@#&&^@%! (insert your favorite profanity here):
WHY THE *&&^%$##%@*(@
1. Can my son not seem to stay off the color red at school? Seriously.......he spit on one of the other students the other day. You know....nothing says good upbringing quite like a large loogy shared with a dear friend!
2. Do we have high stakes testing? My students just finished a test that will determine whether they advance to the next grade and the Einsteins that they are......some felt compelled to answer, "I don't know"....or "TOTAL GUESS" on some constructed response questions. WTF.....people BS their way through LIFE....but nobody admits they are full of nonsense!!!!!!!!!!
3. Can my husband not seem to listen to me when I talk? I have a lot....and I do mean....A LOT of important things to say.....when he unmutes the TV while I am in the middle of speaking...it makes me feel a little stabby!
4. Is Blogher ads sending me messages about not posting? I mean.....really.......it's not like I'm Dooce......I'm not raking in $40K each month in advertising.......let's be real.........I'm not sure I have gotten anything for allowing them to advertise on my blog. So, let me get this straight....you're concerned that you might not get a return on your investment of NOTHING....so you need to temporarily stop the ads on my site? OOOH.......I am concerned I won't be able to make the mortgage this month without the added bonus of the NOTHING I get for you running your ads! I don't need another person reminding of something else I haven't done!!!!! (Seriously......$40K a MONTH? WTH am I doing in the classroom?!?)
5. If my daughter is top of her class........at the top of every standardized test in the state......... WHY, OH WHY....can she not remember the smallest of things I ask her to do? Seriously....is brushing your teeth, washing your face, and SHOWERING without being asked TOO MUCH?! I think not!
See.....it's all puppy dogs and rainbows around here.........missed me?
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